How to Motivate Kids in NextGen Without Leaving Anyone Behind

I was 12 years old, and the coolest magic duo was at my church for a kids’ revival.  I don’t remember their names, but I do remember they dressed like Mario and Luigi.  Of course, with a revival they wanted to get as many kids there as possible, so they held a contest. Whoever brought the most friends would win a new bike.  In the mid-90s that was a big deal. 

I invited all my friends, loaded up my mom’s minivan, and off we went to church. I was so excited because I brought 5 friends!  The time came to make the announcement, and I didn’t win.  Some other kid brought 10.  He went home with the bike, and I went home with nothing. 

Fast forward years later, and I’m serving in my first children’s ministry.  I decided to hold a competition to see who could bring the heaviest offering in a month.  I got a scale and gave the kids containers to fill.  The winner would get a prize. 

My church was an upper middle class white church in the middle of a rough neighborhood.  I had kids who had everything and others who had nothing.  As you can imagine, the offering that came in was skewed toward the rich, white kids.

These two stories and several more helped me develop my philosophy on motivating kids in ministry.  The way I see it, there are three ways to encourage them to bring their friends, offering, Bibles, memorize scripture, or whatever. 

1. Talk them into it

Sometimes in church world we don’t think we should have to give kids and students prizes to do basic church things.  They should want to read their Bibles, pray, and memorize scripture.  If they really love Jesus, then they should naturally want to do it, right?

And we would be right.  But humans don’t work that way.

We have to be motivated to do anything.  Whether it’s a carrot or a stick, intrinsic or extrinsic, we want the joy of the reward or avoid the pain of failure, or both. 

By talking students into it we’re using our words to develop internal motivation to do what we want.  It’s a noble goal, but it’s not very effective.  When was the last time you had a conversation with someone that caused you to develop a lifelong habit instantly? 

Personally, I can’t think of one, and the only ones I can think of are people who had a heart scare or developed diabetes.  But you could argue that in both of those situations there’s a stick involved.  “Do this now or you’re going to die.”

Should kids just want to do this?  Can’t we teach them to do it?  Yes, and yes. But I think we need to use more than words.

2. Give away a big prize

These are classic incentives.  There’s a reason why the lottery hit over a billion dollars recently.  We all do the thing to get the big prize.  My son recently came in with a fundraiser packet and was so excited he could win a Nintendo Switch if he raised $10,000.  He only raised $100. But he got a cool pencil!

It can be a challenge to find the right big prize that fits your budget.  Bikes were great years ago because they were relatively cheap, and kids wanted them.  Now it’s phones, game systems, tablets, airpods, etc.  They can cost a lot, but your kids will be motivated to do the thing you’ve challenged them to do.

However, as in my kids’ revival story, and the lottery every day, only one, or at most a few, wins the prize.  One kid goes home happy while everyone else doesn’t.  In addition, most of the time the big prize is given away at the end of your event. It brings a lot of excitement and anticipation throughout the night, but then let down for 99% of your attendees as they leave. 

Sure, they should be happy for the person that won.  But for those of us that are naturally competitive, that’s a big ask.  I’m better at 39 than I was at 12, but it’s a journey. 

Because of my experiences, I decided for my VBS I wouldn’t give a prize for the most, just to a random kid who came.  I was hoping that this would be a big hit and it was because a lot of boys wanted that Xbox. 

When the drawing came, I called up a 4-year-old girl. 

There was an audible moan. 

Some told me I should have rigged the drawing.  But that’s dishonest. I had to find a better way.

3. Everyone gets a prize

you get a car Oprah meme gif

Insert Oprah saying, “You get a car!” We make fun of it for its ridiculousness, but for me, it’s the best way.  Everyone gets something for doing the thing. 

You brought offering? You get a prize.

You brought your Bible? You get a prize.

You brought a friend? You get a prize.

You brought all three?  You get three prizes!

Oprah screaming everyone gets a car meme gif

Now you might be thinking this can get expensive.  And if you’re going to give everyone a PlayStation 5, it would be.  But instead of spending $500 on one game system, how about spending $200 on 100 prizes, one for each kid? It’s not big and flashy, but it’s still a carrot and everyone goes home happy.

Now when I do offering drives, everyone who brought offering on that day, whether it’s a penny or $100, gets the same prize.  When I challenge kids to bring their friends, they and their friends get a prize.  When I challenge them to memorize scripture, everyone who does gets invited to the ice cream party.

Instead of trying to get kids to bring the most to get one prize, I challenge every kid to bring something to get a prize.

Instead of just celebrating that one kid who brought his entire soccer team to VBS, I’m celebrating her and the kid who brought their only friend.

In all my motivation goals, I don’t celebrate how much.  I celebrate how many.

My goal is to get 100% participation.  And I think yours probably is too.  We want every kid to bring a friend, an offering, their Bible.  I’ve found everyone getting a prize puts me much closer to my goal than just one.

Whatever you choose to give your kids, I challenge you to not only think about the kid who wins, but the kid who may struggle to do the thing you’re asking them to do.  Think about what you want to accomplish.  Do you want one to win or everyone?  Do you want one to go above and beyond or everyone to participate?  The answer can be both, but that’s only possible if everyone gets a prize.

Let’s do what Proverbs 22:6 says.

Start children off on the way they should go,
and even when they are old, they will not turn from it.

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